Friday, April 1, 2016

March 2016

I just reread my last post, makes me laugh.  I should have posted many times in March, huge, hard, amazing month.

I finished class number two! "A" number two!  It was a time consuming class.  I was trying to work a week ahead so that I could finish a week early, before we left for Florida on Spring Break. Crazy, but I did it. I learned a lot about writing.  Thankful. (I am too wordy!  Working on that! haha!)

Jadon had some issues at school, early in the month, made some twelve year old mistakes that aren't tolerated in the current world we live in & ended up with in-school suspension for a few days. Upsetting to say the least, we are dealing with lots of things, my dad helped a lot. I felt like we ended up in a better place than we started out. He lost the privilege to finish the season on the swim team in the process.

About the middle of the month I was feeling the overwhelm, class, vacation preparation, work, kids  in trouble, events to attend.  I knew that Revive Adams County was in town.  I really wanted to check it out, but with all that was on my plate, how could I?

I watched the second night's worship gathering on you tube. After I watched it, I knew that I needed to be a part of it.  Prayed that God would multiply my time and help me be able to go as much as I could and get all the rest of my work done.

I did and HE did! It was a really growing, stretching week.

One story I want to share from this week.  (and you can see me in the video sharing it on the mic) I had went out with a group Tuesday. We were driving around looking for encounters. It was very awkward. Driving around Berne, and not finding anyone to talk to.  We drove past one house and a lady was outside with her daughter, I recognized her, but it didn't hit me to stop and talk to her and pray for her. (I am slow)

After I went home that day, I kept having the lady, I'll call her "K" ,on my mind. I was so burdened that we didn't stop and talk to her. I woke up a couple of days later and knew I was going to have to make an effort and go find her and talk with her.

I went out again on Friday, (groups are different each time) I ended up being a leader for the first time too. Crazy stretching! We didn't know what we were going to do or where we wanted to go, the goal being going out in the community, loving on people and praying for them. As our group talked no one had any direction where to go, so I said "well, I need to get my sister a gift for her birthday, maybe we could go to Walmart and find some flowers I could give her?" another girl said she was thinking go to Walmart too.  So we did.  We walked across and back the front of the store and I didn't find the flowers I wanted to give my sister for her birthday. We stopped and were talking about what to do next and how awkward we felt. I looked up and there in the produce section of Walmart was "K" and her husband and 2 girls! I couldn't believe it!

I quickly told the group the burden I had about missing the opportunity to pray for "K" a couple days before. The man in our group said "you mean you see her right now!? (shocked!)"

"YES!" So, myself and Paige, in my group went over and talked to them, prayed for them in the produce section at Walmart & felt totally amazing! As we walked away Paige said, "well you found one of your flowers."

I looked at Paige and said, maybe we should buy some flowers to pass out to people today! So we did! We went to the hospital, where Paige works and felt like she wanted to go. I told her I had a friend in the hospital that we could go pray for too.  We spent some time talking to people, prayed for a few, passed out our flowers and went to lunch.

When we all gathered back together to share about our day, one person shared they had the opportunity to lead someone to Christ. As they shared their story, they mentioned that the lady that had accepted Christ was with her "fifth grade daughter Shantel". Another light bulb went off in my head. How many fifth graders named Shantel do you supposed there are in Decatur? Well, Kiahna has one in her special needs class that Kiahna and I have been praying for! I had to share with the group that we have been praying for most likely the same girl and her mom!  I had just told Kiahna earlier that week that "we didn't know what kind of mom Shantel had, and we need to pray for them"

I was very blessed by the whole week. The challenge is to keep moving in that direction and sharing Christ. The next week, as I woke up and started my day, I thought, I really wish that I could go out and do that again. And it struck me right between the eyes, how much easier it had become to love on people who were strangers. The people in my life who had hurt, and let me down were not nearly as easy to love as those strangers were. I needed to work on loving the people close to me better. Ugh.

Musical week happened!  Lucas had a great lead and did so well!

I had a wedding during the last performance and that just added to the crazy of the week!

God came through and I got all my work accomplished, class, editing, cleaning up the house, vacation planning, and time to leave for SPRING BREAK!

We enjoyed a week with these people!

Went really well, Kiahna's behaviors compared to the year before were so improved. I left out that we had increased her meds the week before we left, after a huge incident that sent me spinning out and behavior reflected back to where we used to be.  What a mess I was.  But the increase in her meds seemed to do the trick.

I stayed in Florida a couple of extra days with my two girls.  Leah didn't have class until Tuesday. It felt like I was getting a vacation after my vacation.

We got home Monday evening and reality hit hard.  

I discovered that Zach had many friends over while we were gone.  The clean house that I left had been very "lived in". The messes and the things that were damaged sent my peace flying right back to Florida, where maybe I should have stayed forever.

The worst part of it is that he was angry at me for being upset. My levels of disappointment and frustration just kept mounting as I found more and more things that had happened while I was gone all week.

Wednesday, I get a call from Kiahna's school that she had hit a teacher. I have to go get her and she is suspended, and we have a big meeting today to decide what to do.  This is the second incident with hitting a teacher this school year, which could get her expelled.

So many frustrations, I won't go into detail.  Just pray.  I think of her being expelled and how I would add her being home all day and needing to homeschool and I wonder if I am supposed to be doing that, and how I would even do it! Spinning.

**UPDATED TO ADD:  I was surprised by how the meeting at Kiahnas school went today. It was determined that her hitting was related to her disability and they could not expel her.  So, we moved on to do some tweaking to her behavior plan and provide more monitoring and supports.  Hoping they are staring to get the picture of who she is and we won't have too many more of these meetings.  My nerves can't take it!

To say that I have had a hard time finding my balance since I returned home is an understatement.

What a month. 

Somehow we are still, In His Grip,